15% Enell Sports Bras

Hi peeps!

I have more stuff to write (and will do so shortly!), but I got this offer in my inbox today and I wanted to share it in case you all are intereseted.

The sports bras that I used often when I was running are by Enell...they're great for bigger women (especially busty ones) because they really hold 'the girls' to you.  Oprah had them on her list of favorite things a few years back.

The only downside to these bras is that they can be kind of pricey.

Ladies Only Sports has them for 15% off through 10AM MST tomorrow (1/8/13) .  I don't get paid anything...just came across it in my inbox.

Just enter 2013 as the Coupon Code if you're interested.

A hundred todays and a hundred tomorrows

Happy New Year!

I, like almost everyone else in the free world, am planning on watching what I eat and on moving more this year.  So congratulations to me!  I'm human and just like you. :)


I was thinking yesterday about the Scarlet O'Hara idea of "Tomorrow is another day." and wondered if thinking like that hurts weight loss efforts or helps them.  I still haven't made a firm decision, but I do think that there is power in framing things up in "todays" and "tomorrows."

As an example, yesterday I was faced with the option to take the stairs or the elevator to get up to where my cube is.  I thought about it, REALLY wanted to take the elevator.  My knees hurt.  I had just walked up two flights of stairs to get to the entry of the building.  Couldn't I just take the elevator this time?  But said to myself, "Tomorrow I'll take the elevator.  Today I'll walk up the stairs."

I went to a salad place yesterday for lunch but when I walked inside, I saw that the long line rivaled anything you'd find at Disneyland.  I quickly swore under my breath, turned around, and walked out the door telling myself I just didn't have that kind of time to wait in a line like that.  I got to my car and thought of all of the places that I could stop on the way back to work that would be quicker.  None of them were healthy.  And if I can't be healthy on the SECOND DAY of the new year, where is my dedication?  So I walked back to the restaurant, got in line and waited 38 minutes to get through the line and leave with my salad.  Each time I heard the two pretentious ladies who were in line in front of me talking about Kim Kardashian's baby, I reminded myself that this pain was worth it.  I told myself, "Today I'm making a healthy choice for lunch.  Tomorrow I may choose differently."

What I love about this is that it helps eliminate black-and-white thinking.  That I either have to be completely "on" a diet or "off" one; that I need to have everything planned out in advance.

Maybe I'll plan out everything tomorrow.  But today, I'm making the best little decisions I can.  Each time I'm faced with a choice today, I'm choosing the option that gets me closer to where I want to be tomorrow.


P.S.  I've figured out a way around our proxy server at work.  Know what that means?  I GET TO POST MORE OFTEN AGAIN! :) 

Truth telling...

The truth is...I've missed blogging.  Actually, I've missed blogging a lot.

So much has happened since I last wrote that sometimes it just feels easier to skip it all together.  I find myself asking, "How do I give context?" 

But the truth is?  I started this blog with no context for any of you...especially those who happened to find me somewhere along the way.

So, since we're on this subject, here are many of my truths:

1.  I hate dating.  Okay, this you probably already knew.  But it feels a bit cathartic to actually write it.

2.  I want a baby.  Badly.  Not like I'm going to go all "Raising Arizona" on some unsuspecting family but bad enough that I am seriously considering sperm donors.  Wow.  That also feels cathartic to write that.  Out loud.  Ish.

3.  I've been in my new house for a year.  One year and I'm still wondering if I did the right thing by breaking up with Joe.  Because sometimes, I get lonely.  And while I know firsthand that just because you're "with" someone doesn't mean that you don't ever feel lonely, it still sometimes eats at me.  Because sometimes it's hard to forget the comfort and consistency that I found in his friendship.

4.  I've gained back every ounce of weight I've ever lost.  And wow if that doesn't tend to fuck with your confidence regarding my first point.  The thing is?  As I get older, I'm starting to realize that guys mind a lot less than they ever have before.  Unless you count my dad.  Nothing's changed there...he's still a dick to women who are over 100 pounds.

5.   I love my job.  I mean, I LURRRVE my job.  For the record, I switched companies in April and I now work for a company that a certain sitcom likes to call Kabletown.  Some days, I can't believe that they're paying me as well as they do to have as much fun as I have.  I work in a supportive environment - one where I'm rewarded, praised, challenged, and accepted.  Also, I get free cable.  So yeah, I love this company.

6.  My first "real" boyfriend found me on FaceBook and friended me.  That happened about a month ago.  It's still weird.  And I wonder if he's checked out my pictures, my posts, and anything about me.  Don't get me wrong, I don't wonder this because there is any love for him still.  Actually, I don't feel much for him at all.  It's just still weird.

7.  I love HBO's "The Newsroom."  They just finished showing their first season and it's no longer on Video On Demand.  But I love it.  A lot.  And I want to recommend it to anyone.  It's by Aaron Sorkin - the guy who brought you "The West Wing," "Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip," and "The American President."  So yes, it's liberalish.  But it's also fast paced, witty, and absolutely delightful.

8.  I have adopted two orange tabby cats in January.  They're brothers.  Their names?  Oliver and Fat Gordon. And sometimes?  I can't tell them apart.   

9.  I have listened to "El Camino" by Amos Lee several times as I have been writing.  His voice feels like it's snowing outside and I'm inside, bundled under covers, in a favorite sweatshirt and fun pants, sipping hot cocoa.  Listening to his music is like being hugged...only with less groping.  Probably.

10.  I can't think of a tenth thing.


:)

P.S.  Yes.  I also posted this on my other blog.  In fact, I posted it there first.  But then I figured that anyone who might possibly still be interested might be wondering what was up too...even if the major parts of this post weren't weight related.

Trending in the right direction

Well, hello there!

I'm happy to report that I lost weight this past week - now trending in the right direction! The total amount that I lost was 1.8, but for the purposes of the tracker above, it only shows 1.6 down...and that's because I was up 0.2 the week before.

Anyway, YAY ME!  This past week was especially hard because we had a snow storm on Friday in Denver and work was cancelled.  That meant me.  In my house.  Alone.  With all the snacks I wanted.  And silly me didn't think that the snow was going to be that bad, so I assumed that I'd be able to stock up on the essentials (like fresh fruit) later.  Not so much.  I survived though...and made the best choices possible.

This week, I'm on a business trip - in fact, as I write this I'm in the town of Goldsboro, NC.  Traveling, in the past, always meant being on vacation and eating whatever the heck I wanted.  And what I wanted was to binge.  And I'll admit, I did a bit of that last night when I ordered boneless chicken wings at Chili's for my dinner (washed down with a large wheat beer).  BUT I definitely had the points left for that...and besides, that is precisely what sounded good after all day travel.  I had already had my nutritional breakfast in the morning, a baggie of cut up apples as a snack on the first leg of my trip, and a healthy turkey and swiss sandwich (with coleslaw) for lunch in the airport in Cleveland (when the burger joint across the way smelled much more appetizing).

This morning's breakfast buffet had no fruit options and no real "healthy" options.  So I stuck with peanut butter and a toasted bagel and a coffee.  For lunch I had a half of a footlong Subway sandwich loaded with veggies and had the other half for dinner.  I did enjoy a package of Sun Chips with each sandwich and I splurged and had Skittles as an afternoon snack.  Other than that?  Nada.  Truthfully? I miss my mid-afternoon fruit and veggie snacks.  Maybe I haven't made the best of choices every time, but I think overall, I've done well - and I've done markedly better than what I ever have done in the past.

This trip has actually been a huge blessing because I have a nasty cold that has me sniffling, sneezing, and coughing often.  I had some work to do today at the manufacturing plant that I visited here, but for the afternoon and early evening, I was able to nap and read a book.*  And honestly?  That has been just what I needed.

I make my return back to Denver tomorrow and with any luck will be able to restock my fridge with fresh items for the weekend and have a nutritious dinner at home. 

I'm determined to have another loss this week.  I'm determined to get some miles in this weekend if the weather cooperates so that I can start preparing for my 7K in a month.

I'm determined to keep trending in the right direction.

* Confession time: I'm actually on my third book since leaving Denver yesterday morning...I read the first two books in "The Hunger Games" trilogy and am 28% through the last one.  If you're looking for a book to distract you from eating (because you're so into it), these might be the ones for you.

Things I love: Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Breeze

For YEARS I've been drinking skim milk.  Because for years, nutritionists and know-it-all's alike preached the health benefits of it.  Who doesn't love things that are fat-free?  And when you compare the stats on skim milk to whole fat buttermilk, skim wins by a watery landslide.

But when I started reading more about soy milk and almond milk, I became curious.

I've found a new love - especially for coffee and oatmeal.  It's UNSWEETENED Vanilla Almond Breeze.

The stats stack up like this:

That's ONE (1) point for a cup of this...and because it's thicker, I think it feels more indulgent than skim milk - but again, it still has the same point value!

Like I said, I use it in my coffee (my to-go cups hold two cups of coffee, one cup of this, and a few squirts of sugar-free syrup) every morning.  Here's my tip for coffee: heat up the "milk" first before mixing it with the coffee...it keeps your coffee hotter longer instead of cooling it down immediately.  Lukewarm coffee isn't my favorite.

The flavor is *slightly* nutty and there is a vanilla flavor (not sweet though)...but definitely not overpowering.  The color is definitely darker than skim milk and again, it's more opaque. 

I think it's available in the normal dry goods sections of stores, but I get mine in the refrigerated section - and the half gallon is typically good for about a month (according to the expiration date on the carton).  They suggest that you use the product within 7 days of opening, but by using over a cup a day, this isn't a huge issue for me.

There are other flavors that I'm aware of are pictured above - but they are more calories and the sweetened versions are definitely sweet.  My father picked up some regular sweetened almond milk and it was too sweet to mix into my coffee...then again, I'm not a huge fan of overly sweetened coffees.

Have any of you used low points options (other than milk) to lighten your coffee?

Reversing a train

Last week, at Weight Watchers, the scale told me that I gained a few lots of pounds.  If you recall, this was no surprise.  But I wasn't done.

That trending continued through half of the week...but not with as much momentum.  And by Friday, I stopped the train of reckless self-abandon.  By Sunday, I had turned it around completely.

So when I stepped on the scale last night, I was up 0.4 pounds.

I think the hardest thing to do is to stop doing whatever it is that is causing you harm and to choose something different.  I find this especially difficult when what I'm craving is comfort.

Because when I crave comfort, I want to feel good, loved, and, well...comfortable.  Know what isn't comfortable?  Feeling alone.  Feeling deprived.  Feeling out of control.

So sometimes, when I crave comfort, I go for overeating as the solution.  It doesn't feel particularly great, at least, not after the binge-like behavior.  But in the moment?  Endorphins get released, things feel good, things taste good, and more importantly, they feel familiar.

Comfortable.

That is, until the self-loathing comes along.  Although, to be completely honest, that's pretty damn familiar too.

While part of me is ashamed that it took me a week and a half of absolutely horrible eating practices to turn this thing around, part of me is happy that at least I didn't wait until a Monday to make changes.

In fact, yesterday is the first Monday in a LONG time that I haven't gone over my points.  I didn't feel deprived at any point in the day.  I had delicious healthy meals that fueled my body better than crappy food I had been putting in it the previous two weeks.

At the end of the day, I realized that I was okay with not continuing to eat.  I was satisfied - especially after enjoying a serving of Ben & Jerry's new decadent ice cream. 

I counted up my points and voila!  I hit my target exactly.

Today, I had a good breakfast.  I have snacks of veggies, cheese, and fruit for the day.  For lunch I have a delicious veggie wrap and tomato soup and for dinner, I'll have tortilla crusted baked tilapia with broccoli. 

My freezer and fridge are stocked with healthy options.  And while those things don't bring about the same comfort as over-eating does, it does bring about a different feeling of comfort. 

My body, itself, feels comfortable.  I have more energy and I don't feel sluggish after meals.  I feel comfort in staying within my financial budget too by eating food that I already have in my house and not swinging by my local fast food place to buy crap food.

This week, I just want to continue this trend.  I want to continue to eat fresh foods that make my body feel good.  I also want to add in an element of exercise.  I want to not binge on Sunday during the game.  I want to weigh less next week than I did this week.

All of those things are within my control.  All of those things are in the path that I'm currently on. I just need to keep going.

Which way is the music??

I went to my Weight Watchers meeting last night and gained back almost all of the weight that I've lost.

Before I stepped on the scale, my leader asked me, "So...how are things?"  And I gave her the most honest reply I could - being, "I don't want to talk about it."

I still struggle with feeling judged when I step on the scale.  Probably because I still struggle with judging myself based on the number on the scale.  But I didn't feel like discussing all that.  I didn't feel like having a heavy conversation last night. 

So I weighed.  I updated my weight loss tracker at the top of this page.  I stayed for the meeting.  I listened to other people's successes.  And my mood lightened and I started to shed the harsh judgements that only I heap on myself.

I got the weigh in sticker that indicated that I gained and you know what?  The world didn't stop turning.  No one on the street (or even in the meeting) gasped at me or shielded me from their baby's gaze.

Huh.  Go figure.

So I gained.  It's done.  All I can do is come up with a plan for today and for this week.

My plan for this week?  Track.  I do better when I track...and I'm not just talking about weight loss (though they seem to go hand in hand).  When I track, I have a moment to plan, to slow down, and process what it is that I really want.

Last night I met a friend at a restaurant near my meeting...and when I got there, I was famished.  I ate half of the appetizer, half of my entree (but all of the sweet potato fries - yum!).  And had half of the dessert. 

But before I went, I checked out some points values online and I did a pretty good job picking things that wasn't as high in points as others.  This morning, I counted my points, figured out just how many weekly points I blew through, and then started planning for today.

And today?  I'm going to Famous Dave's for lunch with an ex-coworker.  But I've planned out the meal - not picking the "easy" and "diety" go-to choice of just salad (and wow...you might be surprised at some of those point values on the salads).

I'm having ribs, garlic mashed potatoes, and steamed broccoli.  All for 11 points. 

Tonight?  I'm having baked tortilla crusted tilapia with veggies and couscous.  Or maybe a veggie wrap made with hummus, guacamole, and fresh cut peppers,carrots, and cucumbers in a high fiber fold-up.  I'll decide tonight based on if I want a hot or cold dinner.

I like having a plan.  The engineer in me loves being a bit anal retentive.  But the rebellious teenager in me also loves being able to have variety and tasty food without feeling like I'm on a diet.  I like that I can have both.

What's your plan of attack this week?

Adapt. Grow. Evolve.

Tonight, I'm prepared for a gain.  Perhaps even the full 7.2 pounds that I lost two weeks ago.

Here's the thing.  I totally deserve the gain...just as much as I had deserved the loss up until that point.

I have eaten such vast amounts of crap in the last two weeks...and you know what?  I've felt craptastic.  Completely lethargic, depressed, and funk-i-fied.  The mood started before the food...but let's be honest, the addictive food hasn't exactly helped things, has it?

I've eaten stuff that normally never crosses my threshold and I've eaten it in abundance.

Go figure why the scale simply must read significantly more than it did two weeks ago (last week was MLK and my center was closed).

So what to do?

Well, I COULD eat like complete crap for the next week.  I COULD follow this trend.

Or I could actually eat better and feel better.  I could feel more in control and realize that I am not victim to whatever comes into my mouth. I get to choose what goes there and what doesn't.

Just like I'm not a victim of anything else in my life.

In related news, I'm breaking up with Adele's Album "21."  It's moved past cathartic and into a moping stage for me...and I don't think that it's helping much.  It's powerful.  And sad.  And it's easy to dwell on the things I miss rather than the things I have. 

My gosh. 

Isn't that important anyway?  Rather than focusing on the things we are desiring in our minds (and mouths) that will only lead to unhappiness, let's ingest the things that are in front of us and healthy.

Let's let go of the obsessive thoughts about things that have been and instead focus on the good that is to come.

Adapt.  Grow.  Evolve.

Things I love: Sugar-Free Syrups

Not long ago, I used to frequent my local Starbucks most mornings on my way to work.

I'd get a Skinny Vanilla Latte in varying sizes and it was my own very special treat to start the day.  The skinny latte was less points/calories/fat/sugar than what I could get out of the machine at work.  And since there was no coffee pot where I was living, Starbucks seemed like a viable option.

Is here where I say that I cannot afford daily Starbucks trips?  Okay then.

picture from amazon.com

When I moved into my new place at the end of September, I had a plan.  One of the first things I unpacked was my coffee machine - and the second was opening a box with six different varieties of sugar-free syrups made by Torani.

I LOVE to make my own coffee now.  Sometimes I use flavored coffees (Dunkin' Donuts' Seasonal Vanilla Nut is my current favorite) but I always use a squirt or two of the sugar-free syrups.

First, the variety is nice because it means that it's just one more thing in my day that I get to choose - not have to endure.  I like feeling empowered - and even if it's just with a stupid syrup in the morning, I feel good about getting to pick what I want.

I set up each bottle with it's own pump (I have six bottles but only five pumps - bummer!) and they're neatly stored in my pantry - just waiting to be used. 

I haven't even come close to using even one bottle fully - and since I only have five pumps, I haven't even touched the raspberry flavor.*  So these bottles (at least for me) seem to last a LOOOONG time. Some of the reviews on Amazon indicate that people don't like the Splenda flavor - but I haven't noticed it...probably because I don't use a lot of the syrup...just one pump (or if I'm mixing I use a half pump of one flavor and a half pump of another) in my travel mug is all I need.  They're just a few calories and 0 Points Plus value.

Now, I've read some articles about the benefits of limiting sugar AND sugar-free items from our diets.  I fully believe those studies and claims.  Which is why I try to limit my sugar/sugar substitute intake.  Coffee is one of those things that I love to have just a bit of sweetness in and I don't see myself deviating from that any time soon.

*Sugar-Free Raspberry syrup...yours for the taking for FREE.  Just pay shipping (I have no idea what this would be but it can't be much, right?) and I'll get it to you.  It's never been opened or used...I just don't think I'd enjoy it in my coffee.  Send me an email at happyfunpants [at] gmail [dot]com and I'll be happy to send it to you.

And also? No one from Amazon or Torani knows I'm writing this review.  I wasn't compensated in any way...just wanted to share something that I like. :)

It's funny what dedication can do...

I lost 7.2 pounds this week! :)

I'm super happy right now.  Not because it's a big loss (although, let's be honest, that feels awesome).  Not because it's a lower number (although if my goal is to weigh less, this is a great start).  Not even because I got a five pound sticker.

But because I said I was going to do something and I did it.  Even when it was hard.  Even while having three dates - one of which was to watch the Broncos at our stadium for the playoff win (hello, beer and fatty foods much?).

What I love most is how I feel.  I have more energy and I just feel better inside my own skin.  I'm not as lethargic and I'm sleeping better.

So how'd I do it? 

Well, first, I tracked every single thing I ate.  Even when I overate.  I counted up the points whether I was within my target or not.  I think having to write down every bite helped me be more accountable and mindful of what was going in my mouth.  It made me pause and ask if I was really hungry or if I was feeling something else.

Some days I ate past my points target.  But invariably, the next day I under ate.  Not that it was intentional...it's just the way my body was.  One day I was super hungry and the next I wasn't.

So what'd I learn? 

That I can trust my body.  I still need to eat when hungry.  And I need to stop eating when I'm no longer hungry.  I need to be aware of where my calories are coming from - are they coming from higher protein foods so that I'll be satisfied longer?  Or are they coming from "empty" calories that probably won't last?

I learned that every day, without fail so far, I'm hungry at 10:15 AM.  So I have a snack prepared.  Sometimes it's a hard boiled egg.  Sometimes it's a piece of fruit.  But whatever it is, I have it ready to eat at 10:15.  Trying to white-knuckle it to lunch time leaves me feeling deprived.  Eating a snack mid-morning helps me feel more satisfied at lunch time.

My goal for this next week is to just keep tracking.  Typically tracking isn't my strong point, but I think that it's very helpful to be aware of what is going in my body.  It helps me ask questions like "Is this going to fuel me until I eat again?" "Am I hungry or do I want something else?" "What else have I eaten today that is healthy?"

Those questions (I think) are good no matter what program you're following or implementing.

It's week two of the new year, people.  How are YOU doing?