I don't want what happened in Vegas to stay in Vegas

I wrote last week that Joe and I went to Vegas to celebrate us, to get away from the cold, and to enjoy a weekend away from it all.

When we arrived at our hotel, we were greeted with friendly faces and opulence like I have rarely seen.  Vegas screams money and in some of the casinos, you're overcome by all of the luxury and over-indulgence.

Truthfully, just *thinking* about places like that kind of trigger me.  I'm not sure what it is about walking into places that feel bigger than life...do I feel dwarfed?  Inferior?  Like I need to live up to the hype?

Whatever it is, we both kind of felt like kids in a candy store.  We giggled like schoolkids on our way to the room - we had a great time exploring, walking, and people watching.  Seriously, some of the things people wear are outrageous!  I've always been kind of modest and have had roots in Midwest conservative wear...the 8" platform boots, shorter than short skirts, and cartoon like boobs are C-R-A-Z-Y to me.

After we checked in we realized we were hungry, so we went to the buffet at our hotel.

And oh my gosh - the word "over-indulgence" doesn't cover it.  Everywhere I looked, I saw people gorging themselves silly.  It was more honesty than I (or them) probably wanted to admit.  THIS is what gluttony causes, what it creates, and what it means.  People overflowing in their clothes, cramming food down their throats faster than they can possibly taste. 

Honestly?  It was disgusting.  I felt a bit like paying the admission to the buffet garnered me a membership to a place where sick people go to binge.

I was determined to not be one of them.

I walked the entire buffet - surveying each station and dish - trying to decide what I was really hungry for and what really sounded good.

I had a delicious salad - full of fresh veggies that I love.  Then I had 6 pieces of sushi, two pieces of ravioli, and a small scoop of mint chocolate chip ice cream.  That was it.

Each buffet trip we took (one each day) was spent in very much the same way.  The last day I ate a bit more than I normally would've, mostly because I started out absolutely famished.  I ate quicker than I usually do, and by the time that I stopped, I was okay.  But 20 minutes later, I was definitely uncomfortable. 

What did I enjoy at the buffets?  Fresh foods - including steamed veggies and fresh fruits that I usually don't end up getting at the grocery store.  Watermelon is something I never buy because we can never eat all of it before it goes bad...but at the buffets, I could enjoy many pieces of delicious, sweet, and sumptuous watermelon.  It tasted so delicious.  I tried some new veggies that I hadn't ever had before (hello, jicima!) and enjoyed the different flavors immensely.

Whats more, I felt so empowered each time I got up from the buffet (except for the last time) because I knew that I had stopped before I was full.  I stopped before I hated myself and was so miserable that there was no way I could enjoy whatever came next.

We walked around a lot (especially outside where we could be in shirtsleeves and no jackets and still comfortable - something that we haven't been able to do in Denver for a while), we played games, and we lost money.  We took pictures of lions, observed magic tricks, and laughed at silly things.  We drank a handful of drinks the whole weekend and enjoyed ourselves a lot.

I should mention that the meal on Friday night was at a wonderful Italian place.  I had a glass of wine and some mushrooms tossed with fresh gnocchi.  It was so good!  I paused at halfway through my plate and realized that I was still hungry.  So I ate the whole thing.  Like most upscale places, their portions weren't gargantuan, so I didn't feel guilty or bad at all.

We dressed up twice, went to see David Copperfield (which was more than a little cheesy and rehearsed, but still amazing) and Cirque Du Soleil's O (which was mind-blowingly fantastic).


We left money in Vegas, but not as much as we planned on leaving. In fact, our last gambling feat was a pull of a slot machine that gave us $26 and change back.


We had a great time...it was exactly what I wanted out of the weekend and I honestly wouldn't have changed a thing.
I had to tell myself several times to relax, to enjoy the moment, to love where I was at right then and who I was with.  When I was tempted to "eat my money's worth" at the buffets, I reminded myself that the meal would cost the same whether I ate a ton or not.  I reminded myself that my body was worth honoring, worth taking care of.  I gave myself permission to have exactly what I wanted right then - even if it was a salad.  If I wanted something sweeter or saltier at the next meal, that was fine.  But right then I should eat what my body actually wanted. 

I had to remind myself that not eating gobs of food didn't mean that I was missing out.  Those same types of food would be available at the next meal or buffet. 

I want to take what I practiced in Vegas and apply it to my "normal" life here in Denver.  It seemed so easy there to be mindful.  But here, it feels harder.

Is it that my normal life doesn't feel luxurious and opulent?  Maybe.  Is it that I'm trying to spoil myself with Milk Duds and fast food because I feel like I deserve it?  Maybe.  Those are going to be some things that I explore further.

In the meantime, I'm going to try to bring a bit of Vegas home to my life here.  Sans the platform boots and glitter.

Habits

When I was oblivious a few years ago, I thought that things happened TO me.  I thought my eating style was the way it was and doing something different seemed like SO. MUCH. EFFORT.

It's easier to get in the habit of eating badly.  When I load up on carbs or sugar, that's pretty much all I crave.  Then I'd conk out on the sofa while watching some trashy reality TV show.  I didn't have a life (so to speak) so I might as well watch other people live theirs.

Eating until my stomach was full (a level 10 on my scale of satiety), was normal. 

It's no wonder that I gained weight like a champ.  And that I felt more drained than ever.  But getting out of my habit of eating horribly was something I didn't want to do.  It was easier to stay with what my norm was.

The thing is, when I decided to make some changes, via WW in 2008, it did take a lot of effort.  But it was worth it.

And in May, when I decided to stop WW and focus on how I FELT and how hungry I actually was before eating, that took a LOT of effort too.

But what I noticed this weekend was that now that I've been living my life between a 3 and 6 on the hunger scale, I feel so much better. 

I don't want to go down to a 2.  And being at a 7 doesn't feel good OR comforting anymore.

That's my new habit.

Take this weekend.  I went to a little mountain town in Colorado called Idaho Springs with my dad.  We walked around and shopped.  I went into a cute little shop that sold soaps where I indulged.  I bought three bars of wonderfully smelling soaps just for me.  We went into a boutique where I purchased a vase for flowers that I'm hoping to have year-round.  Afterwards, my father and I walked to a nearby pizza shop and had lunch.

I ordered a individual whole wheat pizza with veggies and ate half.  I paused (as my habit is) at halfway through and realized that I wasn't hungry any longer.  I was at a 5 on the hunger scale.

So I stopped. 

My dad is pretty self absorbed still - and the lunch took about an hour and a half because he took a long time eating his whole small pizza.  The whole meal was spent as a monologue for him.

In the past, this would've been a huge trigger for me.  I would've felt diminished.  I would've been hurt that he didn't pay attention to me and that he didn't seem interested in me.  I would've been bored (okay, I WAS bored) and would've eaten out of boredom.

Oh, I thought about it.  But eating the rest of the pizza when I had already realized I wasn't hungry all of the sudden seemed like SO. MUCH. EFFORT.  So I didn't.

Instead, I asked for a box and we went outside to watch the local Homecoming Parade.

Incidentally, I did make my voice heard several times over the weekend...whether he actually listened is another matter. 

And this morning, as I used my uber indulgent soap in the shower, I thought of how good it felt to have a small splurge on myself - something that would bring me comfort and remind me of when I conquered some bad eating habits, even in the face of some emotional triggers.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that habits work both ways. 

Realizing that I had a choice - to treat myself the way I deserved to be treated no matter who was around - was huge.

I matter.  I am worthy of the good feeling that happens when you eat well and when you eat enough.  I don't deserve to be famished.  But I also don't deserve the punishment of being stuffed.

I ate what I wanted, when I wanted.  I felt satisfied, content, and proud.   It's a new feeling - but it's one that I definitely want to make a habit.

Ugh, double Ugh, Ahhh, and double Ahhh

Ugh
I didn't get the job.  But I didn't NOT get the job.  Basically, they haven't made a decision on me but they want to interview other people in hopes of a better fit.  If they don't find a better candidate, they'll offer it to me.  Honestly?  I am a little bummed because it's nice to be wanted.  But they're worried that they won't have someone free enough to train me.  And after the interview?  I was worried about that too.

I know that good stuff can happen even from sucky situations, so I'm hopeful that something will happen.  I've felt so trapped in my current job.  And I'm sad that my situation may not change anytime soon.

Double Ugh

I'm not going to lie to you.  My eating since yesterday has been bad.  As in really not good.  As in I've had way too many "fun size" candies that I stupidly bought for my co-workers.  Other than that (and the two donuts this morning) it hasn't been horrible. 

I did the whole "look" inwardly thing about WHY I was eating when I wasn't hungry...and I understand why I'm eating.  Truthfully, I still had another few fun size chocolate bars even after I figured it out.  But then I stopped, brushed my teeth and am happily sipping peppermint tea.  I'm not waiting until tomorrow to turn it around...it starts now.

Ahhh
I'm going to my best friend's house this weekend.  She has a bulldog named Princess Buttercup that I have known since she was a puppy.  I call her Butterball or PB.  Just after Chassis died, they got a new bulldog puppy, named Miracle Max (or just Max for short).  I can't wait to be covered in sloppy kisses and to have a dog that just wants to sit at my side and be loved.  I'm bringing some of Chassis' old toys to her.  It will be good, but bittersweet, I'm sure.

My friend and I have no real plans.  We might go to a winery to enjoy a wine tasting. I know we're going to a quilt shop. And I know that we're seeing Max graduate from her puppy obedience class. I plan on clapping the loudest. 

I'm heading out tonight and come back on Tuesday mid-morning.  I'm taking the rest of that day off.  I need it.  My soul needs it.

Double Ahhh
I got three new books at the library this past weekend.  I'm taking two with me on the trip and can't wait to dive into them at the airport.  I'm about 1/4 of the way through the first one, "The Help" by Kathryn Stockett and am really liking it.

I also looked at the weather report (this time, yes, I did look at the right city!) and saw that it will be in the low 70s where I'm going to be at tomorrow.  I've brought my running gear to run tomorrow and the other days if I so choose.  I'm determined not to have my exercise take a vacation too.

To be sure, there will be a trip to Steak N' Shake - something that I only get once a year.  Just like last year, I'm not willing to give it up.  It might work for you - complete restriction...but to me, I want to at least allow for the possibility of food I truly enjoy.  This year though?  I'm getting a junior cheeseburger in addition to the junior malt.  I'm going to enjoy every bite of the food - and if I'm too full to eat it all, I promise to leave some on the table.

Just like when she came to visit me earlier this year, there will be a lot of laughter, some tears, and some soul searching.  It's always like that.

I'm learning to be kind with myself, to give myself a break, and to try to love myself whenever possible.  And while I'm not successful 100% of the time, I'm seeing progress from when I visited my best friend last year.  These yearly visits are a good benchmark for me.

So, have a wonderful weekend! :)

Time away...

This past weekend, I went away on a trip to visit an old college friend, his wife, and their two kids.

It was a last minute decision, one that I made impulsively...and one that I regretted once I was on the plane.  I hadn't seen this friend in 13 years.  I've never met his wife.  Even when we were in college, it's not like we had long, heart-felt talks, WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?!?

Turns out, it was a great trip.  One filled with laughter, great conversation, and awesome food choices.  There was an outdoor market where we went and I was able to see the difference between freshly harvested fruits and veggies and the crap that is in most grocery stores.  The bounty of food that was available made me thankful that I lived in a country where fresh food is a possibility.  We are so blessed!

We ran with the kids, skipped and played LIKE kids.  We went to the aquarium and children's museums.  I lifted, carried, and swung the kiddos so many times, my biceps are still killing me this morning.

I had fresh fish for dinner and healthy fresh egg scrambled with great quality ham and veggies.  My only snacks were a few almonds each day...but that was enough to stave off the hunger and enjoy what we were doing at the time.

The whole time, I was mindful.  I passed up desserts, snacks, and seconds because I just wasn't hungry.

It was the first trip I've taken in a long time where I wasn't thinking non-stop about the food that we would be eating, could be eating, or should be eating.  We stayed up late each night laughing and telling old stories from college...and in the morning I was greeted with giggling girls wanting nothing more than to snuggle with me while watching cartoons (the bed that I slept on was in the TV room). 

It was truly a vacation - for my mind, body, and spirit.

It gives me hope that one of these days I can have a positive relationship with food - even while celebrating.

P.S.  Here's this week's friendly reminder to enter the Laughing Cow sweeps for this month on my other blog.  If you can't think of anything funny to write, put up a picture, video, post a link to the blog or tweet about the giveaway.  It so happened that last month's random winner is a loyal reader of this blog - but (obviously) you have to enter to win!

One down, more to go

Joe and I went to Steamboat Springs, Colorado this weekend to celebrate our first anniversary. My friend, Larry, says I can't count it as an anniversary since we're not married, but I say Larry is stupid. :)

Steamboat Springs is about 3 1/2 hours away from Denver and is a quaint little mountain town. Joe and I stayed at a place called the Rabbit Ears Motel...which was a clean and no-frills type hotel. Our room had a balcony that faced the river - which was beautiful. The first night we were there, we decided to open up the sliding glass door and listen to the river run the whole night long. After the taxing events of last week, the solitude and break from the busy world felt decadent.

We chose Steamboat Springs specifically for the hiking opportunity. Specifically, there is a trail that is a 10 1/2 mile roundtrip hike that we wanted to do. Well, really HE wanted to do the 10 1/2 mile hike. I was doubtful that I could complete it, but I figured why not try?

During the hike, we would get to see two waterfalls. This was the first:

Joe and I had heard that it was going to be a tougher hike than just a simple path, but I was not prepared for the grade that it was....this is one picture which shows just how tough of a grade it was...there were times where we had to lift our legs 2-3 feet to reach up to the next food hold.

There were times when I had to take each steep incline one at a time. I'd tell myself to just get over this next incline and then I'd focus on the next. One down, but many more to go.


I'm not going to lie to you...Joe and I made a lot of "old people" sounds when we got back to the hotel. You know the type - the groaning when you get out of the car, the groaning when you stand up, and the sighing of relief when you lay down on the bed.

We had a great dinner that night where I had Peking Duck (something that I had never had before, but I felt adventurous) and then walked around downtown and had a scoop of gelato.

The next morning, we decided to walk around the river just outside of our hotel for a bit of exercise before returning home.

Like I said before, the trip was fantastic...just what the doctor ordered - to celebrate our anniversary (one down, many more to go!) and to shake some of the blues away.

When we got back into town, we were able to gather Chassis' freshly washed beds, her food, and several toys and treats to donate to a favorite rescue of mine. It's still sad - for both of us - and we definitely shed more than a few tears this weekend because we miss her still so much. But we're going through all of the stages of grief as well as can be expected.

I'm looking forward to getting back into our new normal way of life. There are many opportunities that I have passed on over the years because I knew that I had to let Chassis out after work or knew that she needed her medications at a certain times during the day. Now I can take any yoga class I want at any time I want. I can run after work or before work. My schedule is more free. And even though I would trade all of those conveniences to have her back, I think it's okay to make the best of this new found freedom.

Scale this morning says I'm down another pound or so even after eating some wonderful Mexican food last night. So, yet again, one down, many more to go.

Relief!

This past week, I went back to Houston for the second week of company sponsored training. The days were long, and I spent a lot of time worried about the test that I would have to take at the end of the week.

See, I want to change jobs. Badly. If I had to break it down, I'd say that I want to change jobs for three main reasons:

1) I'm strapped for cash these days. No really. I just did my taxes and I made $8K less this year than I did last year - all because they took away our bonus structure. Also, I haven't had a raise since I started working here and it'll be three years in April. Being consumed with worry over money often is not good for me or my soul.

I'm proud of the ways that I cut back last year - it's not easy to remove that much money from your yearly budget without going under. I'm tired of worrying if I'll have ENOUGH. Splurging money on ME (via a massage, a workshop, or even gym memberships) is nice but sometimes it backfires because I worry if I will regret it later when I don't have any money left.

What do I do when I worry? I often turn to food. So worrying about money means that I consume more of it and feel guilty about later. The reality is, I have to break this cycle no matter what my financial situation.

2) I don't like what I do. Years ago, I was an engineer at a major automotive company. I had a chance to learn the financial side of the business and I took it. I figured I could always go back to engineering. Turns out, that's not really the case. It's been 5 years since I've done any real engineering (even though my title is "engineer" at my current company) and I miss it. Right now I bascially do sales stuff, but I don't like that. I never have. Switching jobs will bring more pleasure to my life where at least I'll like what I'm doing.

3) I want to move. Badly.

Two years ago, fresh from a bad break-up, I decided to follow through on selling my house. See, I had just changed jobs from the financial industry to at least be a more technical sales person. The new job paid about $20K less than my old one. Pair that with the knowledge that the ARM on my mortgage was about to go up, I knew I had to downsize.

But at that time, I was so unsure of who I was or even wanted to be. I bought a place in a trendy part of town and downsized from 1500 square feet to 750 square feet. "Stuff is just stuff" I told myself. I can downsize. It might be really mentally healthy! Besides, I can be a Denver version of Carrie in 'Sex & The City!' I'll go to the close by local bars, I'll stay out all night, I'll be that independent woman I admire!

Turns out, stuff is just stuff. But a bad layout of my place means that my place always feels small, cramped, and cluttered. And I found that living in a row home (which is kind of like a condo in the sense that I have people that I share walls with, but not like it in the sense that no one is above or below me) with not a lot of light ISN'T helpful. I crave sunlight. My place is kind of like a cave - I only have three windows for the whole place.

AND as for being like Carrie? Well, I don't *like* to drink to excess. I've never gone to a bar by myself and I don't stay up all night. I don't want casual sex with random guys and I could care less about the "scene." Apparently, I don't want that lifestyle at all.

So I want to move. I talked with my realtor a few weeks ago and my place has appreciated enough (yippee for the trendy part of town) such that if I sell it, I won't lose money even after closing costs and commissions. BUT what I can afford hasn't changed much either (if anything, I can now afford less), so the places that we took a look at this past weekend are run down and have crappy layouts. If I made more money (aka what I'm worth) then I'd be able to afford a bit of a nicer place in a less trendy (but safe) neighborhood.

So, long story short (too late) the training that I went to will help me get the job that I want, a job I'd be (and have been) great at. I'd be able to get the job that would relieve me of the above concerns.

I just need to find that job.

In the meantime, I'm relieved that I won't have to be travelling any time soon. I'm relieved that I can buy groceries and know that they won't spoil because I'll be out of town. I'm relieved that I can cook foods and have leftovers that won't spoil.

And I'm relieved that I get to spend time with Joe. Things with him are so wonderfully fantastic these days - I think, in part, because I am not tempering my love, excitement, or happiness about being with him. The comfort that I get from being with him, falling asleep next to him, and being able to count on him is absolutely blissful. He is one of my best friends and he is someone that I feel loves me just for me being me.

Every now and again, the thought of "this won't last! It never does!" creeps into my head. I know that I have to look at those thoughts as me trying to protect myself from future hurt. So I'm saying it now: I love him. And if this doesn't last it'll be one of the biggest heartaches of my life. But if it does last? It'll be one of the best things in my life.

And oh, what a relief it would be to be done with dating.

I was bumped in Denver and all I got was this lousy t-shirt...

A few months ago, I bought an airplane ticket to go to Chicago for Christmas. My father and grandmother live there and my two sisters were planning on being there for the holidays. I paid for the ticket online via United's website. I paid with my credit card. I got a confirmation number stating that I had bought my ticket.

On Monday morning, I got an email from United Airlines - stating that I was now free to check in. I checked in online 23 hours before my flight took off. United Airlines gave me four chances to upgrade my seat...but since I had already paid almost $600 for my seat, I didn't really want to pay more money. Four times, I clicked the button that indicated that I'd keep my plain ol' seat.

When I clicked through and printed what should have been my boarding pass, I saw that it was actually a travel document, not a boarding pass. I called the 800 number and was assured I had a seat.

Tuesday morning, I checked in at the airport over two hours before my flight was to take off and asked the agent about the travel document labeling. "Oh!", she said. "That happens all the time. They'll assign you a seat at the gate."

I went to the gate and immediately stood in line hoping that the agent would assign me a seat.

They did not ever assign me a seat.

Turns out, you can be "involuntarily denied boarding" because the airline oversells seats. They needed 15 people to be willing to take later flights in order for me to board the flight. They only got 12.

We were told that they would try to get us out that day, but they couldn't make any promises. Since I only had 3 full days with my family planned, losing a whole day and night did not exactly make my day.

In the end, after raising my voice and explaining my needs to the agent, the supervisor, and eventually the director, I (and two other people that were also "involuntarily denied boarding") got seats on the next flight out and the promise of a round trip ticket for free.

I'm not proud of the way that I acted towards the agent, the supervisor, and the director. I was so mad at the time. I still think it's absurd that you can BUY a ticket, you can check-in 24 hours early, you can show up at the airport early and you can do everything right and you STILL don't get what you were promised.

For the past 15 years, ever since I starting taking flights by myself, the airport meant frozen yogurt, chips, candy, greasy fast food, and anything else I could think to indulge in. Somehow I'd convinced myself that diets didn't matter in the airport. Doesn't everyone know it's so hard to eat healthfully in the airport? So then, why even try? High fat and calorie food choices are everywhere in airports. Everyone eats it, so who am I to be different? Traveling is the perfect excuse to eat whatever I want - a built in alibi.

The thing is, after I got a new boarding pass, I realized I was hungry. My sensible breakfast in the morning (one I'll share in a later post) had worn off as it was now 5 hours later. I had (smartly, I think) sliced apples at home and put lime juice on them to keep them from turning brown. I had the slices in a baggie, but I knew that wasn't going to hold me another 4 hours.

I could've decided that that morning had been hard enough and that I DESERVED to treat myself. I was still pissed that I was in that situation. I was mad that I was inconvenienced. I was sad that I wouldn't get to see my sisters until much later. I was worried that my dad was going to get mad at me for being late. I was sad that I wasn't going to see my grandma at all that day...she has dementia and who knows how many more visits I have left to see her? I was disappointed with how I acted towards the agents. Just because they were poopy heads doesn't mean that I had to stoop to their level. I wanted sugar, I wanted the lift of simple carbs. I wanted to just feel better. I could've decided to eat my emotions.

OR I could've taken the time (and boy did I have a bunch of it!) to find a healthy alternative even if it was in another terminal.

And, that, my friends, is exactly what I did.

I ended up going to Itza Wrap/Itza Bowl and had a few bites of brown rice, veggies, and chicken. It wasn't delicious. It wasn't soothing. But it was the healthiest option I had at the time. It wasn't a decision I made out of emotion.

As I sat at the table and stared down at my food, I realized that for the first time in my adult life, I actually ate something healthy ON PURPOSE at the airport.

And that's when it hit me... Airports aren't kind to diets. But I'm not on a diet. My new way of living involves me forgiving myself for some bad choices that I make involving how I treat other people. My new way of living doesn't involve me soothing myself with food. My new way of living allows me to treat my body with respect and to honor it by giving it the fuel it needs.

I'm not perfect. Even though I've had this "new way of living" as a mindset for many months, I don't follow this approach all of the time. But I did THIS time. And this moment, right now, is what matters.

I know that the agents didn't mean to be crappy to the passengers of my flight. I know that they were stressed. I know that getting bumped from a flight sucks, but it wasn't THAT big of a deal. Sometimes bad luck just happens.

It's like that adage - if the problem isn't hunger, the solution isn't food. Eating crappily wouldn't have changed my situation, so why do it? Why fill my body with foods that would make it feel more sluggish and possibly have made my headache at the time worse?

I changed a habit on Tuesday morning...and THAT is worth way more than a round trip ticket any day.

Catch up

Sorry it's been so long since I've last posted.

The best thing that happened in the past week is that my little sister (who is one of my closest friends) came to visit me for the weekend.

It's a little convoluted, but basically, she is from El Paso - which is the same place I am spending Thanksgiving. She flew into town on Friday right after work, we spent the weekend together, and then we drove down to El Paso (11 1/2 hours due to really bad traffic in areas) on Monday. THEN I'm picking up the boyfriend today from the airport so that he can spend Thanksgiving with us. THEN he and I (and my big dog) are going to be driving back up to Denver on Saturday.

The result? I've been away from my internet/computer far longer than I usually am. In fact, I'm trying to steal the internet service (wireless) from one of my mom's neighbors right now as I write this.

Classy.

Anyway, in case you were wondering, I DID weigh in on Sunday morning and I decided to wear shoes to make up for the difference. The result is that I gained 0.6 pounds...and in the grand scheme of things, I really don't care.

My eating has been okay the last few days - the trip down was not full of carrot chips (sorry Angela!) but also wasn't as bad as it has been in the past. I also went for a run yesterday along a new hiking/biking/walking trail here in El Paso. I ended up running 3.2 miles in about 35 minutes...which is pretty good for me. Of course, that didn't exactly counteract the three glasses of wine (hey - that's a fruit, right?) and the homemade gnocchi (with alfredo sauce!) last night. But OH was that good. Besides, I have 35 flex points to use, right?

Tomorrow morning, my older sister, my mom, and I am running the Turkey Trot - which is a 5K race in El Paso. Well, actually, my sister and mom are doing the "family fun walk" which is (I think) a 2 or 3K walk. I'm excited to do something healthy the morning of Thanksgiving and I really want to continue that tradition in years to come. If you're interested, there is probably a Turkey Trot in your town too - they have them all over the nation.

Okay - I'm going to post this now. I'm getting an error message at the top of the screen indicating that all that I've written is not going to be published...looking at the wireless bar, it seems to be that my neighbors wisened up and pulled their internet.

I am not thankful for that.