Thursday, October 4, 2012

Truth telling...

The truth is...I've missed blogging.  Actually, I've missed blogging a lot.

So much has happened since I last wrote that sometimes it just feels easier to skip it all together.  I find myself asking, "How do I give context?" 

But the truth is?  I started this blog with no context for any of you...especially those who happened to find me somewhere along the way.

So, since we're on this subject, here are many of my truths:

1.  I hate dating.  Okay, this you probably already knew.  But it feels a bit cathartic to actually write it.

2.  I want a baby.  Badly.  Not like I'm going to go all "Raising Arizona" on some unsuspecting family but bad enough that I am seriously considering sperm donors.  Wow.  That also feels cathartic to write that.  Out loud.  Ish.

3.  I've been in my new house for a year.  One year and I'm still wondering if I did the right thing by breaking up with Joe.  Because sometimes, I get lonely.  And while I know firsthand that just because you're "with" someone doesn't mean that you don't ever feel lonely, it still sometimes eats at me.  Because sometimes it's hard to forget the comfort and consistency that I found in his friendship.

4.  I've gained back every ounce of weight I've ever lost.  And wow if that doesn't tend to fuck with your confidence regarding my first point.  The thing is?  As I get older, I'm starting to realize that guys mind a lot less than they ever have before.  Unless you count my dad.  Nothing's changed there...he's still a dick to women who are over 100 pounds.

5.   I love my job.  I mean, I LURRRVE my job.  For the record, I switched companies in April and I now work for a company that a certain sitcom likes to call Kabletown.  Some days, I can't believe that they're paying me as well as they do to have as much fun as I have.  I work in a supportive environment - one where I'm rewarded, praised, challenged, and accepted.  Also, I get free cable.  So yeah, I love this company.

6.  My first "real" boyfriend found me on FaceBook and friended me.  That happened about a month ago.  It's still weird.  And I wonder if he's checked out my pictures, my posts, and anything about me.  Don't get me wrong, I don't wonder this because there is any love for him still.  Actually, I don't feel much for him at all.  It's just still weird.

7.  I love HBO's "The Newsroom."  They just finished showing their first season and it's no longer on Video On Demand.  But I love it.  A lot.  And I want to recommend it to anyone.  It's by Aaron Sorkin - the guy who brought you "The West Wing," "Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip," and "The American President."  So yes, it's liberalish.  But it's also fast paced, witty, and absolutely delightful.

8.  I have adopted two orange tabby cats in January.  They're brothers.  Their names?  Oliver and Fat Gordon. And sometimes?  I can't tell them apart.   

9.  I have listened to "El Camino" by Amos Lee several times as I have been writing.  His voice feels like it's snowing outside and I'm inside, bundled under covers, in a favorite sweatshirt and fun pants, sipping hot cocoa.  Listening to his music is like being hugged...only with less groping.  Probably.

10.  I can't think of a tenth thing.


P.S.  Yes.  I also posted this on my other blog.  In fact, I posted it there first.  But then I figured that anyone who might possibly still be interested might be wondering what was up too...even if the major parts of this post weren't weight related.


Nikki said...

I'm glad you are back! Loved to read your blog but then... when things go quiet... well, I've been there too.

Positive that all the blog-land buddies will come and support you as you get back into the swing of things!

-Nikki, a longtime lurker:)

Karen said...

It's good to see you again. I recently gained all my weight back to. And added 6lbs to go with it. Truly sucks. Started back to WW in July so far so good. LOL

I am glad you are enjoying your job. That is the best especially since we spend so much time there.

Hope your back for good. Take care

Kate said...

Welcome back! I have to admit to being a little worried when you stopped posting (even though we've never actually met...which as I type it, seems a little creepy...soorry), so I'm really happy that you were just taking time to yourself, and weren't hit by a meteor or something :)

Lily Fluffbottom said...

Hello old friend! Glad to see you around again!

So much has changed in the last couple of months, I look forward to hearing more from you.

Alicia said...

I love your writing and you! I want you to write here all the time! Thank you, please keep blogging! Alicia

Anonymous said...

Yay! You are back!

Agencja Aweo said...

Ostatnio czytałęm coś zupełnie innego.

Agencja Aweo said...

Świetny wpis. Dzięki.

Nadine said...

The truth is...I've missed your posts.

Daniel S said...

What can I say, life is tough. Perhaps you really need a baby. It will keep you buys, you will not feel so lonely. And perhaps a good guy will enter your life one day.

Saffron said...

Nice to see you back and doing what you do best. I am happy now hehe x