New Goal

Tonight at WW, my leader suggested that we come up with new goals...but she cautioned us to not come up with weight (i.e. numbers) goals. And to be honest, I had (and am still having) a hard time with that.

I'd love to say that I'm driven by generalities, but I'm not. I'm the person who loves to do eTools online because it allows me to check off things and get a smiley. I make lists for the sole reason to be able to check the completed items off of it. So making a general goal of "to fit in a smaller size" or "to be more active" wasn't going to cut it.

I actually stayed after my meeting to talk with my leader. She is an amazing woman and someone that I really look up to. Not just because she used to be a big girl, lost weight, and has kept it off for four years. Not just because she does marathons. But because she challenges me - and keeps me accountable. Tonight we went through a habits profile- which was pretty much a way to figure out what habits you struggle with - what ones are keeping you from your goals.

My habit that I need to work on is "managing feelings" and anyone who's read either of my blogs can tell you that this is no shocker. I've had a hard time managing feelings for a long time - and I bet if I graphed how I feel emotionally with what I weigh, you'd see that in times of stress, I get bigger.

So my leader suggested the goal of becoming conscious of those feelings that urge me to eat. I'll be honest - I'm halfway there I think. Because when I recognize that I am eating emotionally, I'm usually pretty quick to stop it. I also have been trying to do things to keep me from getting to that emotional eating place...but sometimes I bet I'm not even aware of what I'm doing. So this next month I'm going to try to be conscientious of WHY I'm eating.

In other news, I surpassed my 40 pound milestone. I wanted to be down 50 by the time I got back from a trip I'm taking in a few weeks, but I don't think that's going to happen. :) So I'm just going to concentrate on being healthy. I am looking forward to that next washer on my keychain that designates that I am down 50 pounds. For those that don't know WW has started giving washers out to those that have lost increments of 25 pounds...and I'm excited to have 4 of them by the time all of this is done.

The last bit of great news I want to share is that I'm now a shopper at the GAP. Trying on those jeans 2 weeks ago was a reminder that I should try shopping at some of the "normal" stores...and I'm thrilled to say that I'm fitting nicely into some great jeans, slacks, and tops. There are so many more cute tops than what there are in plus size stores! :) Shopping there was definitely a boost to my self esteem and I had a great time walking around the mall with my GAP bag versus the LB bag. I'm going to take my friend Kris' suggestion and try to consign the clothing rather than giving it to Goodwill. The clothes that do not sell I will donate. I have a huge pile to donate/sell but for some reason am having a hard time letting it go. Does anyone have suggestions on how to let go of the oversized clothing?