Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Shrinking body

It seemed like for awhile, I was losing weight, but my body wasn't actually decreasing in size - or at least not markedly. Today I was getting dressed for work and tried on three different pairs of pants and found that they look so. very. bulky. Like I need to not ever wear them again.

I don't know when that happened - but I do know that two months ago, these pants were too tight...and now, they're too loose. I lost some prime pants wearing time because I thought for a long while that the pants would still be too tight...and now I really can't wear them.

I've had two co-workers come up to me yesterday and say that they can really tell that I'm dropping weight all of the sudden. And I'm with them - I haven't really been able to tell much of a difference in the past two months...until the last week. And now I've realized that I'm shrinking.

Why am I writing about this?'s not to brag. It's actually because I'm trying to remember that I'm still me. I'm happy that I'm dropping weight - that the outside of my body is starting to reflect my inside changes. But it's also a little scary. And I'm not quite sure why...other than that these big jumps - or perceived big jumps - in the way I look means that I need to re-evaluate what I look like. And every time I go through that realization, I have to remember that it's still me. I'm still the same person. I'm still funny. I'm still smart. I'm just shrinking.

Has anyone else had this issue? Has anyone else had this need for re-evaluation as they've lost weight - almost a confirming of yourself?

1 Comment:

Mark and Joella said...

I know exactly what you mean. When I was losing weight, it took me several months to really notice it. Other people could see it, but I would look in the mirror and couldn't really notice a change. Then one day, just walking by the mirror, it's like whoa...holy crap I have lost weight! I also think it takes a while to get over thinking of yourself as 'the fat girl', or at least it did me. Especially since that's what I had been my entire adult life. Too bad I am back there again :( But I am working on it...ever so slowly :)