Yesterday at 5:30 in the morning, I got on the scale after not getting on the scale for a few weeks. I was up 3 pounds. My clothes don't fit any worse, but realistically, I'm not sure where I am in the bloating cycle or if this is just an outlying data point. So I didn't stress about the number.
Instead, I got ready for work. At 6:30, I realized I was hungry - and in an effort to actually fuel myself before getting famished, I decided to fix something before my ride in. I stopped and realized that I didn't have time to savor every morsel of food that morning...so I opted to make a meal/snack that would be enjoyable, but would be mostly consumed for fuel reasons. (I wrote about my new philosophy about fuel vs pleasure approach on this post). I toasted a double fiber english muffin and smeared about a tablespoon of peanut butter on it.
Incidentally, as I spread the peanut butter, I realized that I've been letting my portions slide. In months past, I probably would've glopped on a lot of peanut butter... Yesterday, a tablespoon felt reasonable and I didn't feel like I was on a diet just because I was eating less than I normally would've. I could've made it lower calorie by not having the peanut butter, but the protein really did wonders for tiding me over.
I got to work, had two mugs (during the morning) of coffee with less creamer and sugar than I normally do. I'm trying to work my way to black coffee...which is kind of a long story, so I'll save it for another time. But yesterday, I had about a 1/2 a packet of Sweet & Low and about a 1/4 of a cup of powdered creamer (both mugs combined).
And THEN my co-worker brought in BAGELS! From Panera! With yummy cream cheese options! If you've been reading me for a while, you know that bagels are a major source of pleasure for me. I crave them - and their ooey gooey toasted wonderfulness.
I looked at it, thought about it, and realized that I wasn't hungry; that the peanut butter and english muffin had me satisfied. AND I told myself that I could have one later when I was hungry. I felt really great about the knowledge that those bagels would be there later. And if they weren't, I could definitely get a fresh one almost any time of day I wanted. I didn't need to eat them right then because I knew I would have many more chances.
At 11:30ish, I was hungry, but a bagel with cream cheese wasn't going to last me a while. Instead, I re-heated a bowl of gumbo that I had leftover from a meal out last week. I ate about 1/2 to 2/3 cup of gumbo with a toasted double fiber english muffin and maybe a teaspoon of butter between the two halves. I stopped with more left for today's lunch - not really on purpose...but because I was satisfied.
I did have a "fun size" Butterfinger candy bar from the gargantuan bowl of Snickers, 3 Musketeers, Twix, and other candy that my cubemate brings to the office. In the past, I would've had more than a few of these. But I knew that if I wanted more, they would be there. One was tasty and delicious. It was enough. Certainly I was tempted to have more a few times in the day - just because everyone else was. Plus it's RIGHT THERE - where every time someone opens a wrapper I can hear and smell the chocolate. But for some reason, asking myself if I was hungry first was enough of a pause to turn it down.
At 3:00, I was hungry again, so I had two low-fat cheese sticks.
At 5:30, I got home and had probably a half cup of Annie's Cheddar Bunnies as Joe and I walked the from our place to the Pepsi Center where we got to see our basketball team (the Denver Nuggets) play. Joe's company comped him really great free tickets, so we were lucky enough to sit in row 7 (!) for the game. It was AWESOME.
When we got there, I had a Diet Pepsi (I was a bit sleepy at that point) and ordered some boneless buffalo wings. The order came with fries...which I had ONE of. The fries weren't that great, so I didn't continue eating them. The "wings" were okay, but not fantastic. I had three (although to be fair, they were a good size - not like "chicken tender" size, but pretty good sized) and then stopped. I was satisfied.
Joe offered to get beer, cotton candy, nachos, pretzels, or ice cream - whatever I wanted. But the truth? I was completely satisfied cheering for our home team and not snacking on anything.
|What? I always have a watermark across my face... :)|
We walked the mile back home and enjoyed hot tea while putting together some of the puzzle we started over the weekend.
Honestly? It was a great day. Food wise, I made some great choices. And while I didn't eat the lowest calorie things, it really wasn't bad. In fact, on the walk home last night, I added up the points estimates in my head - and they were below what my usual daily target used to be.
So I stayed in my points range and I didn't feel restricted. Sounds like a win to me.
The coolest thing? It wasn't that hard. You know how some days it's all you can do to keep your sh!t together and not eat everything in sight? Yesterday, it was easy to resist things that I didn't truly want.
This morning I stepped on the scale. I'm UP 0.6 pounds.
At first, I was really disappointed - I mean, what was all that about having a great day and then being UP in weight? I re-calculated the points from yesterday...I was definitely within my old target range. So what gives?
I kind of wanted to stomp my feet. I actually thought, "What is the point of having a good day if my weight goes up the next day?!?"
Uh, DUH, Anne! The 0.6 doesn't change the fact that I am proud of listening to my body. It doesn't change the fact that I am on the right track. At the end of the day, I ate less than I normally did, I moved more than I normally do (working out and running aside), and I felt better than I typically do.
It is a win. And if the scale takes a while to catch up, that's got to be okay too.
A few "perfect" days strung together makes a habit; a success story . A story that leads to me being thinner, healthier, and having a better relationship with food than I was before. And that's a story I want to be a part of.