52 weeks

52 weeks ago, I vowed to start a new journey.

52 weeks ago, I joined Weight Watchers and started to change my life in a very real way. True, I had to make a lot of changes mentally before I was ready to start this journey, but 52 weeks ago is when I took deliberate action to get my eating under control.

In 52 weeks, I've lost almost 52 pounds. It's not as much as I had once hoped - in fact, it's a few pounds heavier than where I was a few months ago, but an average weight loss of 1 pound a week? Yeah. I'll take that. Especially since I know I won't ever see that weight back.

So how am I celebrating? By running a 5K race this weekend. By going on a 10 mile midnight bike ride (with co-workers for charity) on Saturday night. By paying special attention to honoring my body and my mind this week.

52 weeks ago I remember telling my leader in a tearful confession that I had never weighed that much before. I was ashamed and scared. The thought of losing 110 pounds seemed SO daunting. I doubted I'd ever be able to get there.

But through support at the meetings, support from my friends, and support from this blog, I've been able to process many issues that got the weight on my body in the first place. And, in my opinion, I've come through this first year as a success. Even though I never had markers that indicated risks, my cholesterol levels are down and my blood pressure is that of a real athlete.

I am healthier after 52 weeks...in my mind, in my spirit, and in my body. I love my body more than I ever have in my life. What started as a way to get my eating in control, turned into me focusing more on healthy practices.

I've tackled some tough issues...or at least started to. When I realized that I still have trauma of some things that happened when I was a kid, (and some stuff from when I was an adult) I've challenged myself to deal with it - hopefully for once and for all.

I'm not perfect. I still struggle with food issues. I still "fall of the wagon" and I still want to initially turn to food as a comfort. But I think that's okay. I had 31 years to abuse my body with food...so it's not likely that I wouldn't fix it completely in the past year. And me loving myself enough to realize that is a pretty big thing.

I'm on my way...and I can't wait to see where the next 52 weeks take me.