Random thoughts

Happy Saturday!

I had more than a few thoughts jumbling around in my head this morning as I was getting ready and thought that I'd share them with you:

First, if you haven't read Lyn from Escape from Obesity's recnet post, I encourage you to do so now. I read it yesterday at work and was realizing just how eloquently she was able to put what I've been feeling lately. Just because you don't have a perfect day or meal, it is okay! You can do this - and the momentum that you've already built up to this point will carry you through. I've been reading a lot of blogs lately and it seems like their authors "slip" up and then they beat themselves up. I know that's been me in the past - and if that's you, I really encourage you to get a fresh perspective by reading her post.

Second, this morning I totally cheated. I weighed myself. It's just that I've been feeling so great these last few days that I thought started wondering if I was delusional. I mean, I know that eating chicken fried steak, hash browns, and grits (Keelie - yes, you're totally right - it was Cracker Barrel!) isn't exactly the diet of champions. So I figured that maybe I should check the scale to find out if I had been damaging my body.

I drug the scale out of the closet, stepped on, and held my breath. And found that I'm down 2 pounds since Tuesday.

To be clear, I don't exactly eat like crap all the time - or even most of the time. True to form, I followed the Cracker Barrel night with lots of fruits and veggies the next day. But I've been on what I feel is the most decadent plan out there - because I get to eat exactly what I want when I'm hungry.

To clarify, yesterday all of our bosses were out of town so at work, it was just 4 of us peons. One lady in my office decided to go and get lunch at a nearby Sonic. She came back with chicken fingers, fries, and a huge milkshake. "Anne - it's buy one milkshake, get a second one FREE at Sonic! You don't even have to buy them both at the same time - they'll give you a coupon for the second one to use later! You should go get one!"

And as I saw her, suck on her straw, my mouth literally started salivating. It was hot outside, and I could practically taste the smooth, silky, sweet treat sliding down my throat. I wanted a milkshake. I wanted one BADLY. After all my hard work, didn't I deserve one? I wanted one RIGHT THEN. Besides, the word "free" gets me wanting to eat anything every time.

But I stopped - and did a mini-body scan. Was I even hungry? No.

So I didn't go and get a shake.

On my plan, I don't eat or drink everything I want whenever I want. But I do give myself permission to have anything I want to have - I just have to be hungry first.

Joe and I went to breakfast this morning and I got the same thing I usually do. I paused halfway through the meal and did another scan - was I still hungry? No. So I stopped and took the rest home to go. I wasn't full, but as I'm experimenting with this, I'm realizing that I don't enjoy the feeling of being full. I like stopping just before full.

I realize that many people may be on a points or calories counting plan where they are doing the same thing - eating half of their food and turning down milkshakes. I used to do the same thing when I was following the Weight Watchers or calorie counting plans too. But when I did that on those plans, I ate half because that's all I could have. My diet told me so.

Now I eat half because that's all I need to feel no longer hungry (note the difference between no longer hungry and full).

The results are the same but the mindset is completely different. And even if that's complete bunk, it is working for me.

Having written all of this, I'm disappointed that I hopped back on the scale this morning. I think part of this plan is the idea that I want to follow is to trust myself and how my body feels. Logically, I know I don't need the scale. But mentally, I wanted it.

I won't weigh again until Tuesday - and even if the number is different than what I saw this morning, I'll be happy. Happy that listening to myself both feels great and has wonderful results.

For now, that's enough.